mornings

T:8:33: Good morning CC
C:8:40: Morning TT.Gooluck
T:10:28: i imagine u inside ur black rover with ur armany i like this life sorry cc i cant stop thinking of u goodluck with ur new life and to bad about me.hug its better then anything
C:10:38:ur funny TT.I dont want 2 cry over old things.I'm looking 4 a good future.soo much here TT.Wish u were here.
T:10:46:how u wish that and u dont want me in ur lifeeeeee u planing for everything cccccc i never go back but lost u for nothing
c:11:01:TT u lost me cause u dont know how 2 treat a woman.I'm not ur friend tt but was ur wife2B.& u never showed it
c:11;03:I"m sorry I dont want 2complain.Just want 2let go without looking back.4give me.but this was the right 2do tt

faster stronger

c:7:59:T I had no$ 2call last night.I charge 2night maybe.T,if u know why I took this decision?Y u didnt fix problem
t:9:26: hey cc i feel sick to many things in my head plz cc be care about ur health and ur belly my liffe coming hard without u i cant think
c:9:38:TT.focus babe!Be a better man& try making something of urself.I told u,u cant be like this.U need 2 change.
c:9:;40:I'm fine.I got medicine &restlast night.Know it's hard,but no chance for anything else.Goodluck with nigeria
T:9:49:cc i dint understand change for what in fact u coming more agressive
C;10:01:babe.u always refuse 2B better.Ur satisfied with what u have&makes me angry.I'm sorry,but it helps me forget u faster when I remember the bad things.it's better 4me&hard 2take this decision 4us.but4 the better :-(

T calls me at night to check up on my piercing and health....nigeria seems to be working for him...I;m happpy....and he's getting a laptop if some freelance work goes well

I hate the goodbyes after a relationship...beginnings are always unforgettable

short hellos

T:8:19;Cc sweet day full of kisses

C:8:27:Thx TT.stay strong&take care of urself.goodluck with Nigeria.I thought u would call last night.i'm fine
t:9:47:Cc hope ur fine i cant open my eyes im so tired i dont know what I can tell u i feel lonely first time in my life my god love u cc
c:10:33:I'm very tired 2.I know ur feelings.I wish u took care of me as woman wants,I would've stayed my life with u
T:10:33:cccccccc i love u beatch
C:My tummy good.but I'm feeling so sick.
I left work earl;y...feeling so exhausted and tired.
need rest. I went o my room and slept...T called me at night.I spoke to him briefly...I didnt know what to say...evenm if I told him why I took this decision he's going to believe something else

THE END

I can say today was the end of almost 2 years with TT.
things were just not working out, so I ended it.
And I know T must have been hurt as I was and maybe more, but things were not in my hand.He spent the morning with me and dropped me off with watery eyes to the airport.

Bye TT, and I hope Nigeria is a new begining for you.

forgetful

c;7:42:bonjour tantoun.I 4got 2 misscall last night,but I was soo tired forgot&fell asleep on the bed.sorry 7ayeti
C:43:Wa BONJOURNNE!!!!I"ll see you tomorrow and beep beep u with the real thing!!!vroom vroonm
tomorrow beirut again...I'm soo tired today...I need rest
Briefly spoke to TT today...will c him tomorrow
C:tick tock tic tock..time is close.sahteing TT.I'm so tired 2day&I know Icant rest the coming days.kisses tt

helicopter love

T:8:31: beep beep hey love miss u ktir waiting helecopter
c:11:19:bonjour TT.happy Iheard u rvoice last night.U read all the letters?!!I wrote many then stopped.hope u liked


Ok long hard day at work, I left work, napped for 1/2 hour, showered and had to get to late dinner....amazing restaurant BICI. Really nice...and piano bar music...prrrr

I forget to misscall TT although I told him I wont...opps!

morning smiles

C:7:36:Bonjour ya knefeh achta helou namoura il amboura,ya 3asal.Kiss u a sweet goodmorning!MWAHHHHH 2 1/2 days left
T:8:35:sasoun u see my smile love beep beep kisses lal attouch
C:9:47:it's been so long without u.how's that smile doing baby?Is it 1635 KM long yet?kiss u mwah mwah.c u soon

T had meeting with guy from Nigeria today with his dad...after he finished he met with D and she gave him the letters....he read them...called me at night

I was sad

normal

C:7:40:Bonjour tantoun!!beep bep bp..WAKE UP TT!I know ur still sleeping.kisssssss mwah mwah 3 days left
T:8:37: hey love beep beep ana min b7eb ya ghanoughete kiss u
C:8:47:peep peep beep beep tarattataa!TT...bonjournne.Have a good Monday morning.smile baby smile!!!

T wasn't apparently smiling that day. He's always upset.
We chatted later in the night.
He was at gym....I left work and went to my room for more freelance work...and washing...nothing special tonight

sundays

sunday...everyone in beirut probably sleeping and I'm at work
C:7:47:boooonnjouurrrr tanton!i cant wait to see u again.kisssssssss uuuuuuu goodmorning
C:9:13:babe.I also want2fix 2 teeth.U think u can manage 2fix appontment with doctor?Maybe sunday morning good.
C:10:03:2 teeth in back,plus whitening.If he can sunday better.&TT catch me baby crab on beach!I want 2 play with it.
jim nice enough to call me evry weekend
c:1:39:fe fish aw ma fish fish bil bahar?hehe.hey T.jim very nice.calls me evry weekend.I cant wait 2 c everyone.
I left work early even though they had some kind of an egg festival going on....I had a big headache and tired...sO I went to my room, put the laundry in the wash, and fell asleep, then got up to the gym, showered and slept again
smsed T before I slept
t:Hey love missed u sweet weather is great not happy like when u r with me kisses love
C;t t.meen 3ando cheghal bokra?wa meen jayii ba3ad 4 days?wa meen kan 3am ya3moul bronzage?Goodnite babe.beep beep tomorrow.sweet dreams tt

Waste

T still didnt go to get my letters...what a waste....
He was out shopping goods for his parents....I was in my room, went to gym early....then showered sat...had an apple...got bored.....browsed the internet....not much to do...might go out shopping
I left shopping at Burjiman later in the afternoon...had lunch and shopped at BEBE...then went to Qudo's for dinner....so loud I didnt hear TT call, but we spoke later when he called and when I got back to my room
I feel sad he doesn't go out beacause of me
T:love what u doing im going take a nap kisses 7obe

work,eat, shop, eat. watch , eat

Woke up early to finish last 3 pages of the Carlito book.
then just sat cleaned, washed, made evreything neat...got bored...sO made contact with my client and she invited me to lunch at Meridien with her family and charity fund guy.....then dropped me off at mall....I bought few things, then we met up for coffee...then to her place ....met the iguana....and the cats......lovely.....and we left to the movies....watched Mad Money...nice movie.....T called me up He was with ceasar...stayed up till 2:00 am...I called him up....he was surprises I was still awake but I couldn't get any sleep

early bird

reached work at 8:30....i think coming earlier better.
C:7:40:bonjour tantoun.thnks 4 calling last night.I was feeling lonely.yalla 7 days to go!!!kissssssssezzzzzz
T:8:38:beeeepppppp love have a nice day kiss u angel
T:8:37:Beep beep angel love u
C:Beep beepHEY TT slow down!!!ur too fast...Intibih idemak..beeep beeep...miss u much much much...kisssss u
c:12;08:hey tt call d 2meet today.U know I'm upset from evryone.I think going 2beirut bad idea.going 2eat now.sahtein
d contacts me...her and Laz patched up....wonder how this wed bet is going to end?!
T didnt meet up with D to collect letters yet...I think he was expecting ssomething expensive or something
anyways,I was soo otired oday, my period killing me...my neck killing me....my back on fire....ughhhhhhh
I left to the villa to rest....got a fresh manicure...and finished all my freelance work
Lucky for me the internet connection worked and me and TT chatted for a while....bit of arguements, but no fighting....
I missed him

thin

So I bought 2 new pairs of jeans and none of them fit!!
AGH!!!! what a waste of money....I'm becoming too thin...I should watch myself....need to shop in beirut
T:8:21: Beep beep my woman drive fast my god how much i need u kisses
C:8:26; Oh tt,I missed u much.I cant recharge my phone b4 the weekend kiss u all over.have a good day sweety.mwah mwah
C:12:59:I didnt 4get u 2day,but sooo busy&I'm sick.sahtein if u ate.kisses tantoun
C:1:02:wlak tantoun.wainak ya albi.bidalak b3eeed.maybe I can get onlint tonite.I found out the house has intrent.
T:1:03:thx 7ayeto im not eat yet salemtik sansoun be care 7ayeto kisses zlik zlik
c:3:12:hey tantoun.how's work babe?I think if i stay here longer my clothes will fall off.I'm geting thinner!
T:3:20:ya 3omre ya sasoun i offered a new job i ate koussa miss u ya aghla al 3alam
C:3:24:shatein TT.What new job were you offered? A differnet position or a totally different job?

I hate my clothes today...I wanna sho pfor nice things....lebanese clothes dont work for dubai
T:My woman let me know if ur online
C:No I think they gave me wrong password.tt im feeling so lonely here.no one asks about me all day.i just sit and work work work.miss u.goodnite baby

T calls later to calm me down....prrrrrrrr
8 days to go
worked all night and fell asleep alone...few tears

not much.... sleepy again

which i can get some real sleep.
T8:26:Love good morning beep beep kissing u be care 3omre
C:8:34:hey TT.sorry I forgot to miscall last night.I was so tired.beep beep.drive with eyes open tantoun
c:11:28:10 days 2cu again TT.miss u.so much 2 do.can u c when i can do piercing again B4I fly back 26th night.
C;1:33:sahtein tantoun.I'm feeling si ck today.I think i catch a cold in hot weather.ughhhhhh!wainak ilioum?kuss u
T:3:27:Hey love to much work miss u 3omre take about ur health sasoun what u ate today for me beme!kisses hayeto
C:3:38;7aeyti,I never know what I'm eating.it's all bad.I"m getting my period I think.I'm busy too at work.kisss
went to my room after work....gym for 30 minutes...got really tired....then lonliness....Laz calls to relieve himself from stress.....then I fall asleep...no calls from TT but I sms him goodnite

rent

Got up to work early...feeling tired still....long day at the office, nothing much going on....Ac still an issue in the room...i hope to solve soon.
went out in the evening with new roomates to meet everyone.nice dinner and shisha...i was sad thoguh at cost and methos of rent
TT calls and I speak to his mom....i am feeling bad

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Sooo tired...no sleep last night and lots of work at the office.TT calls me that he's going to beach for 2 hours with his nephews....I"m low on money to call....had a long sleepy day.
T:hi love kifal ya 3omre im at the beach 2 hours go home kiss u
Left work to sleep, and got stuck with Laz complaining about Darine's behaviour during the weekend...complaints, emotions and bla bla bla....I couldn't sleep...so I just manicured myy toes and hands....then fell asleep.
Thank God TT called me for goodnights...I was feeling lonely
T:Hey Cc what u doing love.im just woke up nothing to do if u can go online send me a msg missed u ghanouge

Over

Drop my things at new house.....then head to hotel for coffee, tea and breakfast with family....then Helicoptwer ride above dubai, was the surprise....back to hotel...I leave D and dad to head to Dragon Mart and Polo while I go to market to get some goods...come back for intense room cleaning...prepare room and head back to Palace to meet up with family and we leave to wonderful Thai restaurant..which was great but then D and Laz, got to major fight, so back to hotel without Laz...I head back to the stuffy room...can't sleep till 4am.T with his nephews sleeping over today.

Family bonding

dad and d arrive...go to meet them at lobby of the Palace..
hugs and kisses...we have a light breakfast,then head to al Qasr, some open buffet restaurant...boat ride...then Polo...very hot D and dad get annoyed so we head to hotel...I go to change...then meet up with them at Meridian for a dinner on a boat...then walk around the resort and back to hotels

soooo relaxed

Called T up early to tell him I found a place to stay
Had a good night sleep last night
T:8:29:Im happy to u love ur so amazing and strong god bless u
T:12:47:hey love where r u waynak ghanoughe im a little bit sad like the weather today missed u baby
C:1:01:tantoun!Sorry babe bas toooo much work today...running and working and so many things.My dad&D coming tonight
T:1:02:no not yet i dont know why I'm crying
C:1:04:TT plz dont be sad.Smile.the sun is shiny here& weather hot.Plz Tantoun be relaxed sweety.u ate?sahtein
C:1:06:I'm sorry TT for all this.Really.I know if I stay in Beirut maybe better 4 us.but things changed somwhow.
C:1:11:I know why.I feel it too believe me.It's not only im my hands.I feel we are falling apart tantoun.really.
C:1:19:I couldn't eat anything today 2 bebe.I cant sleep.last night was hell.what u want me to do.I cant go back.

D engaged

Get up early to open a bank account.Sms TT: Ya TT.thanks for calling last nnight.i was feeling down.I'm opening a bank account today to put all my hard earned money.good morning 7ayeti.kiss kiss
T;Sansoun love hellooooo ghanoughte min habibi.tatou tatou beep lick lick bon journne cc
C:11:16:Hey TT!Lazlow engaged to Darine yesterday.He got her a diamond ring and stufff.IT's very funny this girl.
C:1:04:hey love.I"m going to vomit from bad food here!UGH!!Dan will call u tomorrow to get 100$ for dentist.okay luv
C:1:35:i'm so tired from work.I wish I can go to sleep.babe how's ur day?i miss u.mwah mwah mwah
after work I went back to hotel and slept....I was so exhausted from all the hard work...I couldn't move even to the bathroom
Later I went out to check the villa I was to share with 5 others....not bad at all.Pool and gym available...I lliked it a lot...and sooo quiet there.so relaxing...people seem fine and friendly.
I had a light dinner and fell asleep again.

sleepy

T:8:33:Hey love beep beep sansoun love u much be care zlik zlik
Called T up..he was at the site working today
C:TANTOUN amboura TT.how's work baby?Is everything ok.i'm fine.just a lot of work & hungry.kisses 7abibi
T:tizik bel denen 3ach3ouch
SO today noone contacts me from home,I'm feeling down.
T feeling down and in tears...I call him to see what's wrong....I think relationship going down down down...ugh!
go to gym, shower, freelance work
T calls me up to cheer me, I'm sad...I think he is too

shake it off

Call T around 8:00 he's going to work
T:8:37: sasoun waynek beep beep tizik bil dene
not much going on today...trying to book a ticket to beirut soon....gym, work work work....manicure..
Laz calls late from Munich....I"m a bit bored but got work to finish...sleep and forget to place alarm in the morning

far far away

normal day at work.after work....light dinner and watched "Spiderwick"
feel T so far far away every day
T:cc im online 3omre
T tries getting online but his connection sucks, I get a bit mad...I had to go out to eat.
weather bad in beirut, not much to do
I'm trying to stay busy here with work

out shopping

Hotel all day.....left later for polo, to watch the game, then to the souk to buy clothes for work...and after dinner in the mall , and back to hotel.
Clothes so expensive!!
things not going well with T.
C:oh luv.i dont know what to write.But i think a lot about this problem and it hurts so baf.I hate this happening to us
T:whats ur planning today cc
C:Babe i'm going shopping today and laz invite me for dinner and boat ride later.but now in hotel a bit.what u doing?u got work all day?
T:hey love im just finish work going to cut my hair be care cc
T:I cant stop thinking of u cc be strong love

good day

C:8:00:BONJOURNNE LUV! beautiful day here@ dubai.I'll see u on the bridge.we have many here,come on,come over
T:8:40: hey love beep beep miss u sasoun
C:12:48:meow meow meow...hey luv.I just had lunch earlt today.I miss u.wainak ya T wainak.why u not next to me?
c:2:44:SAHTEIN TANTOUN !Keef il amboura hal iyam?Mich 3am shoufah.I miss u babe.I feel like I'm talking to myself.
not much tonight...just movies and dinner...but TT so strangly far from me...he didn't even misscall at night : (

Insomnia

Spoke to T this morning...we are both becoming insomniacs...
C:9:36:Hey T.I just spoke 2my dad.I thik he's coming over next week!That's so cool!+I'm worried about u not sleeping
C:1:00:I'm sad.I keep remembering the days in Beirut,&somehow I'm beginning to have a new views of life.for better.
C:1:18:I just had lunch.not bad.Mloukieh,chicken,fattouch,hommos.Sahtein 2u luv.maybe 2nite chat online.i'll tell u
Laz is an a******....he never calls or anything....soo european...
went to gym and went to spa for a Rescue Eye treatment
Then sat in my room tried to finish some work...but i was tired and Wissam and D kept me busy chatting
I forgot I blocked T...we tried to get him to chat with me, but it didnt work : (
He called me laster...he was with Ceasar sticking stickers on the ice cream shop

so far

GOt up early...walked to the bank and to work

T:8:20: hey love beep u see me yow yow yow kiss u sweetheart
C:11:00:hey love.My heart is aching.I hate this distance between us.I feel the pressure more each day.It's killing me
C:11:04:I want u2 go out movies,eat,play soccer.I am still planning my trip back.I dunno when.luv u.be careful babe
T:11:03:cc i cant do anything without u it's hard but my love never stop try to save money and dont look for man love u cc
C:11:19:me 2 luv,but it's hard here without u by me.how long u think we can stay far apart?promise 2 try ur best plz
T:Love i want to take more experience to can take a high salary there in dubai i need a little time and i promise u to spend my life with u to deth love u cc
C:I understand love.We'll discuss it online or once I reach beirut.It seems like forever 2 see u again.missu
I was kind of sad all day at work....called D, Laz, T, Dan.
Walked to hotel...prepared meeting with Lina. She arrived about 7:00, picked me up and we went out to havanas for dinner with her kids...discussed the book, and had a good talk.
T calls me up at night...was at the gym...he says, that he needs to get his work experience...that could take forever....how long can we be apart.
I couldn't sleep or eat.
Neither could he.